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Who Am I?
The Importance of Racial and Cultural Identity
By Michele St. Martin
Andria* of North Carolina has mixed feelings about the importance of her infant daughter's cultural identity. Andria and her husband, Ted, have a daughter, Sharon, and after experiencing secondary infertility, decided to adopt. Sharon's sister, Kara, is Cambodian.
"I will answer questions for [Kara] and tell her a little, but until she is older I will not force any of it on her," Andria says. Andria's family has made friends with other families who have adopted from Cambodia, and they plan to stay in touch "because I don't want her to feel isolated and so different." At the same time, Andria isn't sure that stressing her daughter's cultural background is positive; she worries that it will make Kara feel "different than her peers here in America." Andria sums up her feelings by saying, "I feel my daughter should know her past, but that she is an American now."
Beth Hall disagrees. She feels that both family and culture are equally important to a transracially adopted child. "We need to embrace all of who a child is," she says. "It is 100 percent important that children feel they are part of the family. And it is 100 percent important that they feel they are part of their race/ethnicity."
Their son's racial identity is so important to Ilene Watson and her husband, Shane, of Kentucky, that they plan to move to a more racially diverse area when their son is older. "I feel it is extremely important for Cameron to know about his culture," Watson says. "He is going to be expected to act a certain way around groups of African American people, and a different way around groups of Caucasian people. It will be difficult for him to fit in with friends of his race if he hasn't been exposed to people of color. I don't want him to ever feel like an outsider, and I want him to appreciate the wonderful culture that he comes from." The Watsons have several African American friends, including an African American couple who adopted a biracial son through the same adoption agency. "We have a wonderful relationship with them, but are always looking to expand our circle of friends," Watson says.