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Where Do I Start?

Adoption Information for Beginners

Part Three

By National Adoption Information Clearinghouse

Adoptions can sometimes be arranged without an agency. Initial contacts can be made directly between a pregnant woman and adoptive parents or by the pregnant woman and an attorney, depending on state law. Independent adoption is legal in all but a few states, but there are significant variations regarding specific aspects of adoption laws of which you should be aware.

If you pursue this approach, retain an experienced adoption attorney to explain the adoption laws in your state. Talk to other adoptive parents. Become familiar with the Interstate Compact on the Placement of Children (ICPC), because in interstate adoptions you will be required to comply with the adoption laws of both states. You certainly do not want your adoption to be challenged because of failing to comply with the relevant adoption laws.

To initiate an independent adoption, you must first locate a birthmother interested in relinquishing her child. In the states where it is legal, advertising in the classified section of local newspapers has proven to be a successful method for bringing birthparents and adoptive parents together. You can advertise on your own or use a national adoption advertising consultant. Another way to locate a birthmother is to send an introductory letter, photo and resume describing your family life, home, jobs, hobbies and interests to crisis pregnancy centers, obstetricians and all of your friends and colleagues who might possibly lead you to the right person. Some families have even advertised on the Internet.

Simply locating a birthmother is only the first step. You also need to know about the birthfather. States have recognized the rights of birthfathers to be involved in decisions about their children, including adoptions. Many states have established registries (putative father registries) as a way for birthfathers to register their intention to support and be involved in their child's life. Several high-profile lawsuits have involved contested adoptions where birthfathers were not notified of, and subsequently objected to, the adoptive placement of the child.

Want to see more?

• Domestic Adoption: Building a Family
• International Adoption: Building Families Without Borders
• Transracial Adoption: Outside Reactions to Your Family
• Check out our Article Library.
• Talk about it!