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Open Minds and Open Hearts
A Glance at Open Adoption By Margot Poss
eir child. This has been beneficial in cases where medical questions need to be answered or family traits are prevalent.
"In one case an adopting family couldn't understand why their child was crawling backwards," says Gritter. "While it was cute, it raised questions as to why and does it foreshadow concerning medical problems. When the birth mother confirmed that she too crawled backwards and grew up to be a fine, healthy adult, it waylaid the unknown."
A similar story involved a child who was suffering terrible gastrointestinal complications. When doctors were able to consult with the birth parents, they avoided the need for intrusive, painful testing because the birth parent revealed a past medical history that ran in the family.
Many adoptive parents feel that the knowledge that the birth family has selected them to be the parents assists them with the transition and allows them a feeling of validation. "The strong, general pattern is that parents in fully-disclosed adoptions demonstrate higher degrees of empathy about adoption, talk about it more openly with their children and are less fearful that the birth mother might try to reclaim her child than are parents in confidential adoptions," says Dr. Ruth McRoy of the University of Texas in Austin. "The sense of performance in the relationship with their adopted child followed this pattern."
Studies continue to reinforce the benefits that open adoption provides. Gritter readily admits that he would not consider undoing the openness of these adoptions, even given the imperfections that exist in our world and society. "The value that comes from all members of the triad or adoption process being open and candid with one another allows for a healthy, nurturing environment where individuals own their decisions and reach their own conclusions," he says.
Knowledge provides the basis for enriching relationships where adoptees, birth parents and adoptive parents alike can grow, heal and nurture each other through the challenging and emotional process of adoption.