- my iParenting
- quick clicks
- iparenting adoption articles
- iparenting adoption q&a
- community & groups
- research baby names
- prepare a birth plan
- content channels
- ip channel rss feeds
- read birth stories
- read parenting stories
- recommended books
- e-newsletters
- safety recalls
- ip diaries
- ip store
- mom of the month
- dad of the month
- editor's letter
- letters to the editor
From Our Sponsors
- e-newsletters
- Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters
- award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Keeping Ties After Adoption
Help Your Child Hold on to Heritage
By Julie Laatsch-Kitchen
s. Ties has every detail set up for you so that you don't have to worry about connections, food and making arrangements with agencies and foster mothers. They had an exceptional crew of interpreters and tour guides, as well as a psychologist who was a Korean adoptee herself, to help guide us through the physical and emotional landscape. 
In retrospect, we feel privileged to have been able to give our adopted children this enriching experience. I think all adoptive parents, foreign or domestic, should seek out such experiences to help the family, and especially the adopted children, explore the issues of their heritage and how their special family came to be.
5. Is there one incident that occurred during your trip that you will always remember, or your children?
The most enriching experience for each of our children seemed to be the opportunity to visit the agency, review the file for our older son and visit their foster mother. The tension was palpable as we approached that day, but the joy they experienced was amazing. They both beamed from ear to ear as they visited with their foster mother. The obvious bond that had formed, 15 and 11 years ago, respectively, in those short months, was simply amazing. As we said our good byes, it was visibly difficult, especially for our youngest son, to let go of his foster mother again.
The other enriching experience, which we have to mention, is the visit to the orphanage and the maternity home. It was extremely emotional, but very enriching, especially for our older son. The expectant mothers asked questions of the adopted children such as "Are you happy?" "Are you accepted and loved?" "Are you angry with your birth parents?" They also explained how they "did not want to give up their birth children, but had to due to the circumstances they were in." The room was filled with tears, on all sides, but the messages were critically important to the adopted children. It was an experience that I don't think you could duplicate in any other setting.
While the trip was very well planned and the schedule was filled with events, Ties made it clear that this was our family's trip, and that if we wanted to skip things on the itinerary to spend time with your family, that was fine with them. We took one day off in Busan and explored the city and the beach for the day. One evening in Seoul, we wanted to see a Korean professional baseball game. Becca and Pat helped us organize it and encouraged us to invite other families. It was a great experience and yet one more example of how wonderful the Ties organizers were.
We had a number of "talk times" in the evenings for adults and children, when we could exchange ideas, questions and experiences of the day with other families and the tour guides. It was a wonderful opportunity to exchange information and learn from other people's experiences and perspectives.
As we said above, we were enthusiastic as we approached the trip. When we completed it, we felt privileged to have had the opportunity to offer these unique experiences to our children and our family. Korean Ties made it possible!
For more information about The Ties Program, please visit them online