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Lifebooks
An Adoption Backstory
By Kelly Burgess
Price feels it's particularly important to maintain a lifebook when the adoption crosses racial lines simply because this type of adoption creates a loss of privacy and intimacy. People will inevitably come up and ask about the family relationship. Just as it gives parents a level of confidence for eventually talking to their children about adoption, it gives the child a level of confidence for talking to others about their situation.
As for when to introduce the lifebook to the child, both Price and Probst agree that it should always be available, and Probst notes that the child should be the guide. "Some of it is waiting for children to ask their questions," she says. "In addition, we plant seeds of information to set the stage for greater future understanding. The lifebook belongs to the child, so it's important to make it accessible so that they are able to turn to it again and again. A lifebook for a younger child would be more visually appealing, while a lifebook for an older child, who is better able to understand abstraction and distinguish between fact and speculation, would rely predominantly on the text. What's most important is that the information about the child's early life is made available in a sensitive and honest way that emphasizes the child's strengths and resilience."